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Never complain, Never explain.

24 November 2009

It's. Your. Choice.

It’s the season of thanks giving and I would like us all to remember how important it is to give thanks.  Whether you’re terribly bothered by the slaughter of the indigenous people in this our magical land or not, that’s not ultimately what this season is about.  All of the political correctness flopping about in schools these days has contributed to the ongoing rash of selfishness that plagues this world.  No longer are you allowed to wish someone a happy Christmas or freely celebrate the spirit of Thanksgiving because it *may* offend someone who is not you.  What must it be like to perpetually walk around looking for things to get upset about?  How miserable a life must these people live when they cannot rise above the petty grievances of history to live in the here and now?

Oh, but I digress…

The true reason for today’s blog is that I am baffled, friends–truly befuddled.  Absolutely and totally.  The more time I spend trying to figure things out, the more confounded I become.  For instance, FACT: People complain.  This is nothing new, I know.  People think of some problem, instance or situation of which they have absolutely no control or vested interest and then complain about it ad nauseam.  Why?  Well, I suppose, to some extent, we all need moments when we can vent our frustrations.  This is understandable and I wholeheartedly support venting from time to time.

Here’s the thing: At some point, complaining serves no further purpose.  Eventually, complaining is just complaining.  When this happens, hang it up.  Dial it back.  Take it down a notch or ten.  No, seriously, I’m telling you, it’s not doing you or anyone else any good.  At that moment, it’s time to pack it in.  Get it out of yourself.  Write it down.  Have a chat with God.  Whatever you have to do, but get it out of you and move on.

Constant complaining and the persistent need to explain yourself or someone/thing else; these are the things that poison our otherwise whole, peaceful, and good souls.  Sometimes there is not explanation.  History is past and we can learn from it or dwell–our choice.  This endless cycle of complaining and explaining will eat away at you until there’s nothing left but a shell.  You will have spent so much time worrying about things that don’t matter that nothing will matter.  You won’t even see the good where there is good.

And that’s my point here, people.  Thanksgiving and the rest of the holidays–whatever you celebrate–are meant to be celebrated for the best possible reasons.  Today people get together for good reasons regardless of what happened back in history.  Are you slaughtering the Indigenous people?  No.  Okay then.

This Thursday, you can choose to sulk about the fate of those native to our land (of which I am a descendant) or you can get together with whomever you are sharing the day with and just. be. thankful.  Ultimately, that’s your choice.  You can whine and complain about the commercial aspects of Christmas or the stressful moments with your family–OR–You can be thankful that you have family.

You can worry over the winter solstice, quibble over the actual date of Jesus’s birth (or that you don’t believe in Jesus, and are, for some reason offended that others do–“It’s not fair”–boohoo), fight with people who wish you a Merry Christmas, or go about saying “Bah humbug.”  You can do whatever you choose.  But I think you might be happier if you can suck it up, get over yourself for five seconds, and try to think about the existing spirit of the season.  Merry Christmas does not translate into: “If you don’t believe in Christ, YOU are a bad person” or “You HAVE to believe what I believe” any more than Happy Thanksgiving means “I’m happy that the Europeans came here and slaughtered the Indians.”  I mean, honestly, people.  “Land of the free” means that we are all free to celebrate however we see fit within the bounds of the law.  If you don’t want to celebrate–well, that’s your loss.  If you want to sit at home and pout or roll your eyes and bad mouth all the “stupid, ignorant Americans” who are celebrating, go right ahead.  But don’t bug me about it.  Stop complaining about it.

Your pervasive attitude is YOUR business and wholly under your control.  In the same way that “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent,” (wasn’t that Eleanor Roosevelt?) so too, no one can make you feel depressed or angry without it either.  At the end of the day, you are responsible for your own feelings and actions.

So today, I suppose, my point is that once you get that negativity out of you (whether it’s about the holidays or some other issue) and turn it over to your diary, best friend, or God–once you’ve done that, it would be wise to do as Kate Hepburn once advised:

Never complain, never explain.

That’s all for now.  ASAP

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Nicolle permalink
    24 November 2009 4:33 pm

    I agree – complaining is terrible… it compounds on itself and turns people bitter. Give it up to the universe and let it go!

  2. Jessica permalink*
    24 November 2009 6:00 pm

    It had occurred to me that perhaps I was complaining about complaining. But, I did qualify that by saying that sometimes you have to vent. Which I was doing 🙂

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